WHEN Caroline Carr’s husband became clinically depressed, she couldn’t find the support she needed, so she wrote a book about it.

Now Caroline who lives in Parkstone, is regarded as one of the UK’s leading experts for partners living with depression.

“When my husband was depressed 12 years ago, it was very hard as I didn’t know what to do because depression is so insidious. You can’t see it and you don’t know what to expect next,” she says.

“They can be very sad and incredibly negative or very angry and hostile, and it is usually the partner who bears the brunt of it.”

Caroline says she ended up blaming herself as she felt unable to help.

“My husband did get some counselling and medication but it didn’t stop the depressed behaviour.

“I decided there must be millions of people in a similar position – if I was struggling with this then there must be many other people too.”

So Caroline wrote the book Living With Depression, which contains information about what to expect if your partner is depressed and strategies on how to keep yourself positive and healthy.

At the same time she set up a community website called Help! My Partner is Depressed, which has just been re-launched as, Let The Sunshine In.

“Although its primary aim is to support the partners of those who experience depression, it is also for anyone who feels they need a bit of a boost – particularly if they are going through a tough time.”

Research shows that people who care for those they love, are less likely than others to be in good health and their health deteriorates as the time spent caring increases Caroline, a former probation officer, is now a qualified life coach and hypnotherapist with a practice in Wimborne and London.

She is also a teacher of laughter yoga and runs regular workshops in Parkstone.

Caroline adds: “Sometimes it’s too easy to become worn down by what is going on around you, so it’s important to reconnect with your bright side and let the sunshine into your life again whenever you can,” says Caroline.

Everyone who becomes a member receives a free eBooklet: Better than a bunch of flowers.

There is also a forum where partners can get advice, connect with and support each other and a sunshine corner – with recommended books and films, quotes, poems, some video interviews.

“Relationships do change. Even when your partner better there is always an underlying fear that it might come back Caroline adds: “Although nobody has got all the answers, you do have a choice on how you deal with it.”