IT should be the happiest time in a woman's life but for the majority of new mums the first year of motherhood is the loneliest, according to a new survey.
Cut off from family, friends and work colleagues, mums find the world of motherhood very different to the cosy one they imagined.
A crying baby, lack of sleep, and getting to grips with your infant are just some of the challenges faced in the first year of being a new mum.
The hardest thing they have to cope with is feeling isolated, according to The Motherhood Survey 2007, commissioned by Mother & Baby Magazine and Tesco.
Not so many generations ago, most new parents lived in the same neighbourhood or town as their own mothers and enjoyed a natural network of family support and company.
More than half of women surveyed said they feel "lonely and isolated"' where they live, with 64 per cent living miles away from their own mum and 47 per cent admitting they have never really spoken to their neighbours.
Feelings of despondency are further heightened by a lack of social life, with seven out of 10 mums saying that their social life is either non-existent or a fraction of what it was before baby arrived. They also feel irritated that their partner's social life hasn't really changed, with well over half saying their post-baby social life is far worse than their partner's.
The dad's working hours and solo social life were cited as the "two main causes" of their rows and a quarter of mums say their relationship has "gone downhill" since having the baby.
Five per cent have split up, eight per cent "almost have" and 47 per cent "argue more". Only 19 per cent say their relationship is stronger.
Elena Dalrymple, editor of Mother and Baby Magazine, says: "Leaving work and having a baby is a huge physical and emotional adjustment for women. It's a whole new ball game and a totally different way of life to the one they knew before.
"Friends without babies drift off, grandparents live miles away, neighbours are barely on nodding terms, other mums you bump into at the shops aren't your type and the social life you once knew has ground to a halt.
"Meanwhile, babies are extremely demanding and life for new mums can be very lonely in our modern anti-social society."
Debbie Howells is a midwife and has been running the Bournemouth and Poole branch of Babyfit UK for three and a half years.
She says: "I have noticed that the social aspect of my classes is high on the priority list.
"New mums like to feel that there are others in the same boat as them, and great bonds are forged not only between the adults but the babies too, which last for years.
"One can never underestimate how physically and emotionally demanding a new baby can be, and as one in 10 mums suffer from post- natal depression, I suspect this contributes to their feelings of isolation."
Debbie is keen to point out that it isn't just mums who can feel lonely.
"The new mother tends to get lavished with care and attention, while the father can often get left out of things. Nowadays men are encouraged to take part in such activities as ante-natal classes, for example, to keep them involved."
Jenna Copeland, Tesco Baby & Toddler Club manager, says: "There are many joys associated with parenthood, but the issue of isolation is very real for mums."
It's in direct response to our members' feedback that we wanted to launch The Mother and Baby Local Campaign, offering mums the chance to meet up in Tesco cafes throughout the country for a coffee and a chat.
- For further information about the initiative, log on to askamum.co.uk or tesco.com/babyclub and go to the chat room.
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