BERTIE joined the family about a year ago. A small fellow, we have seen him develop and quickly fit in.

Mild of manner and slender of proportion he sits quietly in the corner of the kitchen and is ready to jump to every culinary command...

This literary flow has got you wondering hasn't it? "The Echo's paying him too much - he must have a resident chef," I hear you cry.

Well sadly, Saunders & Dean Towers does not boast such an extravagance. But the next best thing perhaps...

Bertie the breadmaker is the Raymond Blanc of our household. He's a dependable sort of chap and not nearly as pricey.

And unlike many chefs he doesn't back chat, give smart alec replies or volleys of swear words.

Indeed working with Bertie is a silent pleasure. Simply flip open his lid, pull out the Teflon coated tub, throw all the ingredients in and three hours later hey presto - a perfect loaf.

During the process an appetising aroma of cooked bread wafts through the house making it feel like a proper little bakery.

Bertie will also produce your bread when you want it, but there's a bit of technical jiggery pokery required which we haven't quite fathomed yet.

He's not just a one trick pony either - he'll produce fine jams too - and there's no need to ask him nicely.

Gordon Ramsay or Jamie Oliver will tell you that homemade is best and that goes for bread too.

It's superior to that shop-bought stuff because there are no additives.

But the only drawback is that homemade bread will only last a couple of days before it goes stale. A loaf of Hovis will last a week.

So from now on we're resigned to eating thicker slices.

And what does this have to do with world affairs you might ask?

Well, healthy eating is never out of the headlines. And it just goes to show that yummy homemade food is not impossible.

The next step is to follow Raymond Blanc's Les Manoir Aux Quat' Saisons in Oxford and devote some of our garden to vegetables. Nice idea - but one step at a time...