THE first question you have to ask yourself is what one luxury item you would request to take with you on to your deserted island?
Julian Clary, when a guest on BBC's Desert Island Discs, asked for an all-purpose prosthetic limb; Ruby Wax requested a large bed and Vic Reeves some potato seeds.
If I were marooned on an island I would follow Sacha Distel's example and go for a grand piano.
Long Island in Poole Harbour has just been put up for sale. It may not be the sort of scorchio' place that the Desert Island Discs people had in mind when they conceived the programme (although, with global warming, who knows what the future holds?) but it is certainly picturesque.
The second question is this: if you were to buy the island, what would you do with it?
Obviously, you would have to begin by arming yourself with lashings of ginger beer and a dog called Timmy and search for an adventure. But what then?
Among neighbours are the birds at the Arne sanctuary. And they, I suspect, would speak for many in asking for as little change as possible please. The delight of the Poole Harbour islands is the tranquillity.
Offers for Long Island in excess of a million pounds are invited and that sounds a real bargain but still rules most of us out. I suspect it may sell for a lot more. For most of us it is hard enough to stump up enough cash to buy a beach hut, let alone an island... but at least we can dream.
So why would I take a grand piano as my luxury item if I were to be marooned on an island? To be honest, Rachmaninov's second concerto is a little beyond me. As is Chopsticks. In fact I can't play a note.
But I could shelter under it when it rains.
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