If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it… but someone try telling that to the numbskulls at BBC2 who’ve ruined my television viewing by ditching the entertaining links between programmes and replacing them with something tedious and dull.

Those mischievous little robotic 2s, which used to scamper around getting into all sorts of trouble were just great. But some interfering type at Shepherds Bush, who thinks they know what’s good for us, decided they had to justify their salary by coming up with something new.
So, what do we have now, in between the University Challenge boffins, who make me feel inadequate, and the even bigger brain boxes on Horizon, but predictable shots of crashing waves and a cappuccino, as if I’m not already bombarded enough by frothy coffee and chocolate sprinkles every time I venture up Old Christchurch Road.

Oh no, they’re really clever, you say, because the waves crash through a hole in a rocky outcrop that’s in the shape of a giant 2 – maybe it’s Durdle Door and they digitally manipulated it – and the chocolate sprinkles make the shape of a 2.

No, they’re not clever, just a variation on a theme nicked from Channel 4, whose burning bales of straw and bits of buildings floating about are also tedious and dull.

Bring back the furry 2 that did a front flip and squeaked when Crufts was on and be quick about it.